Goodbye Week 15

Hello Dying-to-Self

Someone mentioned things would get better about week 6. And she was right - breast feeding finally clicked for us (but whoever said it wouldn't hurt, or your nipples would toughen up, lied) and longer stretches of sleep at night allowed me not to fully lose my sanity.

Someone else mentioned that motherhood became enjoyable at 3 months. And she was right too. Finally, a year after we found out we were having a baby, I can honestly say that I absolutely love being a mom and I'm even back to considering doing this all over again. =) I'm even considering having all 4 of those kids Ryan and I used to dream about.

Zoee sleeps through the night - and I mean 8-12 hours of sleep. We still struggle to get out of the house before noon of course, but at least we seem to be well rested!

Zoee loves sitting up - with the aid of Mommy or Daddy's fingers, the couch, or her Bumbo. She can throw quite the 'tude if she thinks she's been laying down too long, or in too much of a slouched position.

Zoee is Miss Gabby. She's always loved that tongue of hers, but now it blows bubbles and makes noises and she just can't wait to tell us about everything around her. She's discovered she can almost make that motorboat sound too - but it's mostly just a wet slobbery mess right now.

Zoee has very ticklish ribs. Sometimes I laugh when she laughs, sometimes I cry - it's the best noise in the world.

Zoee is discovering that she can control her appendages. She doesn't quite have rolling over figured out yet, but I have learned she can no longer stay on the couch unattended and she's always in a new position when we get her out of her crib in the morning. She also reaches for toys and is getting much better at holding on to things and putting them directly in her mouth.

I can't believe we've come so far - it seems like just yesterday she was sleeping softly in our bed between our pillows... Now she talks to us, and smiles at us, and giggles, and stays in her bed like a champ.

I recently began reading a book called Home by Choice. It's about the psychology behind being a career mommy or a homemaker mommy. I haven't gotten very far in it yet - because really, when do I have time to read?! ;) But it's been very interesting and very encouraging. Before Zoee arrived I was struggling with staying home so much. I think of myself as a very independent person, but really I'm probably on the verge of just plain selfish actually ;) but I'm finding out how extremely rewarding it is to die-to-myself.

In my Christian walk, that phrase was always something I carried around with me, but never really knew how to do it, or actually chose to do it I guess. But now I find that it gives me great joy to die-to-myself so that I can meet the needs of my husband and daughter. And I'm discovering that even though I'm still learning how to do it, I can do it without having a bad attitude. Everyday this "task" seems to get a little bit easier - a little bit more enjoyable. And the more I practice it, the more I think I will find it easier to do in regards to my relationship with Christ. Actually - now that I think about it, I wonder if the distinction is there at all...